


Dirty

by margarks



Category: Troubleshooter Inc. - Suzanne Brockmann
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-09-17
Updated: 2011-09-17
Packaged: 2017-10-23 19:39:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 383
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/254108
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/margarks/pseuds/margarks
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Set directly after Jules picks up Robin in <i>Hot Target</i>.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dirty

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the “dirty" (# 3) prompt at [smallfandomflsh](http://smallfandomflsh.livejournal.com).

The water was scalding, but it still wasn't enough. Even though his skin felt like it was on fire, Robin continued to scrub, as if he could somehow scour the layers of filth away.

He felt so dirty.

The worst part was that Cosmo had been right. He couldn't blame anyone but himself for this.

Robin kept seeing the look on Jules' face, kept hearing the way Jules' voice sounded – as if he were holding a thousand words back. He'd hated the polite, professional mask that Jules had used, knowing how hard it had to have been for the other man. And still he'd cleaned Robin up and gotten him home, all business, even if Robin had been able to hear the words Jules wasn't saying. Robin was ashamed, so fucking ashamed of himself.

Why had he done it?

He'd told himself that he was curious, wanted to believe it, too. But, a part of Robin knew that hadn't been the only reason. A part of Robin knew that he'd done it to get back at Jules, too. And that was what was really eating Robin up inside.

Jules had been honest with him, had told him that he wasn't, _couldn't_ be with someone like Robin. Someone who wasn't sure... someone who was still experimenting, trying to figure things out. And Robin understood, he really did. He knew how much Adam had hurt Jules, knew that Jules deserved something so much better. Better than Adam. Better than Robin.

Better than a man who wasn't sure of anything, least of all himself.

He felt tears prick his eyes, so he ducked his head under the spray and let the water wash them away.

Yeah, Robin had understood, but like the selfish bastard that Jane sometimes accused him of being, Robin had felt the sting of rejection and, consciously or not, had decided to do something about it.

Jesus, he was such a fucking prick. Even if... even if Robin could... would... Jules deserved so much fucking better.

Robin turned up the hot water and grabbed the soap again, hoping that this time he could scrub hard enough to wash away his sins, his guilt. Hard enough so that some of the pain could bleed through the numbness.

God, he needed a drink.

THE END.


End file.
